I just received an e-mail that really sparked some thoughts in my head! I am going to give the URL of the web page below and it will open in a separate window so you can look at it and then switch back here to post a comment on my comment.
What you are going to see is a mind-boggling array of famous Black men romantically linked to non Black women. I mean mind-boggling!
Now in my youth I was typical of Black women who cringe and are bothered by seeing a Black man with a non-Black woman. As I began to grow in spirit, I tried to examine just exactly what bothered me about the situation. The obvious reason seemed to be that the White woman has been ingrained in our culture as the highest standard of beauty. For many years, successful Black men sought to be with White women as a measure of their success.
I do think though that this situation has changed over the years. I believe that our culture has evolved to the point where Black and non-White women are far more appreciated than we were in the past. And because I do know that God is color-blind, I found myself no longer automatically offended by the sight of an interracial couple. I learned to give each man the benefit of the doubt by recognizing the possibility that he may well have simply fallen in love with this particular woman and not purposely sought to be with someone not of his race because his taste ran outside of the female side of himself. I realized that those Brothers who were seeing White women as the ultimate standard of beauty had not yet evolved to the point of loving their mothers, their sisters and themselves.
Seeing this photo gallery has made me question whether or not our standards truly have changed. Perhaps this was just wishful thinking on my part?
Or is it that we as Black women are driving our men away by our attitudes and expectations? It has always been said in the Black community that one of the primary reasons Black men gravitate to White and Asian women is because they are more compliant. Do we Sistahs need to evaluate how we relate to our men? Are we strong enough to consider the possibility that it just might be us?
I'd love to know what other Sistahs think.
Check out the gallery
What you are going to see is a mind-boggling array of famous Black men romantically linked to non Black women. I mean mind-boggling!
Now in my youth I was typical of Black women who cringe and are bothered by seeing a Black man with a non-Black woman. As I began to grow in spirit, I tried to examine just exactly what bothered me about the situation. The obvious reason seemed to be that the White woman has been ingrained in our culture as the highest standard of beauty. For many years, successful Black men sought to be with White women as a measure of their success.
I do think though that this situation has changed over the years. I believe that our culture has evolved to the point where Black and non-White women are far more appreciated than we were in the past. And because I do know that God is color-blind, I found myself no longer automatically offended by the sight of an interracial couple. I learned to give each man the benefit of the doubt by recognizing the possibility that he may well have simply fallen in love with this particular woman and not purposely sought to be with someone not of his race because his taste ran outside of the female side of himself. I realized that those Brothers who were seeing White women as the ultimate standard of beauty had not yet evolved to the point of loving their mothers, their sisters and themselves.
Seeing this photo gallery has made me question whether or not our standards truly have changed. Perhaps this was just wishful thinking on my part?
Or is it that we as Black women are driving our men away by our attitudes and expectations? It has always been said in the Black community that one of the primary reasons Black men gravitate to White and Asian women is because they are more compliant. Do we Sistahs need to evaluate how we relate to our men? Are we strong enough to consider the possibility that it just might be us?
I'd love to know what other Sistahs think.
Check out the gallery
Posting the comments a male friend sent to me. Very Interesting:
ReplyDeleteSistas are strong, If you are just thinking sex whites seem to be much easier, less hang ups etc.
1. As you mentioned standards of beauty defined by whites. our kids learn this early on.
2. Sisters are not that available in higher society.
3. Good looking sisters are too proud to be somebodys hoe.
4. white women are confident, shameless and aggresive, They believe they deserve what they want.
5. Sisters need to get in shape, to fit the so call model women. Which is based on a white physique.
6. Sprituality does not seem to be big among blacks. Religion is our bag.
Just a few thoughts, I am also rethinking what is going on, you made some good points. Most blacks that I know are very physical people.
Thanks for your comments
Me again, Posting another comment from a brother. This one does us Sistahs Proud! It is in response to a message from a White wman, engaged to a black man who is disgusted by all the nastly looks she recieves from Sisters.
ReplyDelete***
Let me start by saying that I am a 28-year old black man. I graduated from one of the most prestigious universities in Atlanta , Georgia with a Bachelor of Arts Degree in Business Management. I have a good job and have recently purchased a house. So, I consider myself to be among the ranks of successful black men.
I just want to set the record straight of why black men date white women. Back in the day, one of the biggest reasons why black men dated white women was because they were considered easy.
The black girls were raised in the church. They were very strict about when they lost their virginity and who they lost it to. Because of our im patience to wait, brothers would look for someone who would give it up easy without too much hassle. So, they turned to white girls.
Nowadays, in my opinion, a lot of brothers date white women because they are docile and easy to control. A lot of black men, because of insecurities, fears, and overall weaknesses, have be come intimidated by the strength of our black women. We are afraid that our woman will be more successful than us, make more money than us. Because of this fear, many black men look for a more docile woman.
I have talked to numerous black men and they continuously comment on how easy it is to control and walk over their white women. I want A Disgusted White Girl to know that not all successful black men date white women.
Brothers like Ahmad Rashad, Denzel Washington, Michael Jordan, Morris Chestnut, Will Smith, Blair Underwood, Kenneth 'Babyface' Edmonds , Samuel L. Jackson, and Chris Rock all married strong black women And, to flip the script, there are numerous white men who openly or secretly desire black women over white women. Ted Danson, Robert DeNiro, and David Bowie and Robert Thick, to name a few.
I just don't want a disgusted white girl to be misinformed. Stop thinking that because you are white that you are some type of goddess.
It was the black woman that taught you how to cook and season your food. It was the black woman that taught you how to raise your children.
It is because of the black women's strength, elegance, power, love and beauty that I could never date anyone except my black Queen. It is not just the outer beauty that captivates and draws me to them. It is not the fact that they come in all shapes, sizes, colors and shades that I love them.
Their inner beauty is what I find most appealing about black women..
Their strong spirit, loving and nurturing souls, their integrity, their ability to overcome great obstacles, their willingness to stand for what they believe in is why I have fallen in love with black women.
I honestly believe that your anger is geared more toward jealousy and envy more so than snotty looks. If this were not so, then why do you continuously go to tanning salons to darken your skin? If you are so proud to be white, then why don't you just be happy with your pale skin?
Why do you continue to inject your lips, hips, and breasts with unnatural and dangerous substances so you can look fuller and more voluptuous?
BOTTOM LINE: If I were looking for a docile woman, someone I can walk over and control, I would give you a call. But, unfortunately, I am looking for a Virtuous Woman. Someone that can be a good wife and mother to my children. Someone who can be my best friend and understands my truggles. I am looking for a soul mate. I am looking for a sister and; unfortunately, you do not and CANNOT fit the bill.
No offens e taken, none given.
Signed, Black Royalty